Do you push past your fears?

You may not realize it, but every single person in power has most likely faced their fears. I don't know each and every one of them. But I do know what it feels like when I get past my comfort zone and push past my fears. From what I've read in books on people who reach their success, they all go through that. So are you pushing past your fears or are you letting them take over and filling your life with regret? My feeling is that life is too short. That if we don't go after the dreams we have for our life, then what is the point? I got a message email today from one of my favorite spiritual authors, Neale Donald Walsch, about fear and this was his take. "...that fears are nothing more than states of mind. Napoleon Hill said that, and he was right. The moment you move into fear over something ask yourself, "Why am I making this real? What is there inside of me that drives me to do this?" There is a huge difference between fear and caution. Caution moves forward with care, fear stands still, paralyzed. Avoid paralysis at all cost. It is not good for the soul -- and it gets you nowhere". So if this is true, then when we fear having a meeting with a high-powered producer, even though we may feel paralyzed with fear, nothing bad is going to happen to us. It's not like we're putting ourselves in danger or harm's way. So we just need to push past that. Even just this weekend a friend of mine at one of the TV studios wanted to ask for a promotion. The person she was approaching was kind of outside of protocol. But in order to get the promotion she was going to have to do this if she really wanted to succeed. She risked getting fired if the person she went to also agreed what she did was not kosher. There were people at her work warning her it was a mistake. But my take was that these people were jealous. Because they were making her feel insecure. (Remember a previous post about when writers are jealous? This has to do with that, even though it wasn't a writer). This whole ordeal was making my friend sick to her stomach and she almost decided not to do it at all. She felt paralyzed by her fear! But I let her know, it was nothing but fear. It wasn't a real danger. That she was meant to go after this career or she wouldn't be having the passion for it. So I told her, she had to have the meeting. She did. And the head person could not have been happier! She's open to hearing exactly where she sees her career going. It's going to turn into a discussion about what my friend wants, but she's on her way! I've had my own numerous times of fear, each and every time I've had pitch meetings, or phone calls with producers, or lunch meetings. Each time they get easier and I'm sure eventually they won't be a big deal. But right now, to me, they are. But I acknowledge my fear and I push through it. I just say, okay, there's that fear trying to stop me. I'm not going to let it! And then I go on my way. I've seen other writers who have let it get in the way. They don't know they are. But they sabotage every opportunity that comes their way. They end up spinning their wheels for opportunities that are easier and don't lead any where. And they can't understand why they don't have true success. But it's fear! They would much rather do something with less success possibility because it keeps the fear at a minimum. But then they will be living life with regret. And that's no life! So go after what you want. Face your fear! And before you know it, you'll be living you dreams!

Tonight I stumbled upon an article by Lisa Selow on the website healyourlife.com. She talks to women about following their own destiny, but really, as writers, I feel like this can be meant for all of us. This was the year that I decided not to care as much if my friends didn't see me. This was the year where I finally said "no" to volunteering for everything my son was signed up for. This is the year where I put my writing first! Because that's my destiny and if I don't put it first, no one else will. A lot of what Lisa writes about is being a really positive person in all aspects of life and well, that's who I am too. But I think when you decide to be that way, you're already feeling so positive about the world, that it's easier to be self-loving and treat yourself better. I'm sure I have more wiggle room to keep putting my writing first. I do fall back into old ways where my mommy guilt gets in the way and I start to feel like I need to entertain my son instead of write and let him be the self-sufficient 9-year-old that he is. But it's a balance. Being a writer and having personal relationships isn't easy. The right amount of time we balance between spending it with our fictional characters and the real ones that love us. It's not easy. But I'm guessing the more we work at it, the better we'll get. So here's Lisa's article for anyone who's interested. I hope you enjoy it like I did. http://www.healyourlife.com/author-lisa-selow/2012/11/wisdom/personal-growth/rebel-with-a-cause