Do you push past your fears?

You may not realize it, but every single person in power has most likely faced their fears. I don't know each and every one of them. But I do know what it feels like when I get past my comfort zone and push past my fears. From what I've read in books on people who reach their success, they all go through that. So are you pushing past your fears or are you letting them take over and filling your life with regret? My feeling is that life is too short. That if we don't go after the dreams we have for our life, then what is the point? I got a message email today from one of my favorite spiritual authors, Neale Donald Walsch, about fear and this was his take. "...that fears are nothing more than states of mind. Napoleon Hill said that, and he was right. The moment you move into fear over something ask yourself, "Why am I making this real? What is there inside of me that drives me to do this?" There is a huge difference between fear and caution. Caution moves forward with care, fear stands still, paralyzed. Avoid paralysis at all cost. It is not good for the soul -- and it gets you nowhere". So if this is true, then when we fear having a meeting with a high-powered producer, even though we may feel paralyzed with fear, nothing bad is going to happen to us. It's not like we're putting ourselves in danger or harm's way. So we just need to push past that. Even just this weekend a friend of mine at one of the TV studios wanted to ask for a promotion. The person she was approaching was kind of outside of protocol. But in order to get the promotion she was going to have to do this if she really wanted to succeed. She risked getting fired if the person she went to also agreed what she did was not kosher. There were people at her work warning her it was a mistake. But my take was that these people were jealous. Because they were making her feel insecure. (Remember a previous post about when writers are jealous? This has to do with that, even though it wasn't a writer). This whole ordeal was making my friend sick to her stomach and she almost decided not to do it at all. She felt paralyzed by her fear! But I let her know, it was nothing but fear. It wasn't a real danger. That she was meant to go after this career or she wouldn't be having the passion for it. So I told her, she had to have the meeting. She did. And the head person could not have been happier! She's open to hearing exactly where she sees her career going. It's going to turn into a discussion about what my friend wants, but she's on her way! I've had my own numerous times of fear, each and every time I've had pitch meetings, or phone calls with producers, or lunch meetings. Each time they get easier and I'm sure eventually they won't be a big deal. But right now, to me, they are. But I acknowledge my fear and I push through it. I just say, okay, there's that fear trying to stop me. I'm not going to let it! And then I go on my way. I've seen other writers who have let it get in the way. They don't know they are. But they sabotage every opportunity that comes their way. They end up spinning their wheels for opportunities that are easier and don't lead any where. And they can't understand why they don't have true success. But it's fear! They would much rather do something with less success possibility because it keeps the fear at a minimum. But then they will be living life with regret. And that's no life! So go after what you want. Face your fear! And before you know it, you'll be living you dreams!

It's a TV exec meeting!

I just realized I never wrote about the meeting I had over the summer. I guess they are becoming so normal I forget to share them! It's been my goal to share these experiences to help writers who have not been through them yet. So that when you are, you know what to expect. So if you've read any of my previous pitches, you'll notice that when I first started pitching "for real" I would get pretty nervous the first day and it would take me a few pitch meetings to really warm up and be myself. So over the summer, one of my friends who is a high-profile TV producer had asked me to come in and help him with ideas for a TV show of his, and that the network head would be there. Yikes! When I first posted this blog, I said I hadn't met with one of those before. But silly me, I had when I pitched to the ABC execs. But what I hadn't done is had a meeting with them. I've had a pitch meeting where you go in and say, hey, you don't know me, please buy my show. But this was a meeting where a person the exec respects and works with is saying, please meet this talented writer who you should respect too. NOW that was a new thing for me. I should probably back track and explain that my TV producer friend produces live event shows and award shows, things like the Emmys, but not the Emmys. So he tells me the Network exec is flying in from New York for the day and he wants help coming up with ideas. He tells me they want to revamp the show from previous years. He tells me a couple clips I can find online and that's pretty much it. He's so busy, he doesn't give me more direction than that. So, just as a heads up, if you're ever in that position, you do NOT wait for more direction! You dive in head first and figure out every single scenario they could probably want solved and how you'd solve it. You look at the show and figure out what you like, what you don't like, and what exactly you'd do if you were to make the show something YOU'D want to see. I repeat, you do NOT wait for them to tell you what to do! If you do, you've blown your opportunity to impress some really high up industry people. So, I spent a couple days getting my hands on as much info and clips of the show as I could. Then figured out what could possibly make the show even better. I knew that I only had one afternoon with this woman to impress her, so I didn't have my usual meeting or two to get comfortable. My TV producer friend trusted me enough to come up with great ideas, so I had to go with that and share exactly what I thought would help them. Luckily when I met the Network person, she was very nice and made me feel very comfortable. So once we started working and talking about the show, I told myself, "Here we go!" and started giving my opinion whenever asked or whenever I thought I could help. Both of them were very open to all my ideas and that only added to me feeling more and more comfortable. I will say, that when I have an idea for a show or script idea, I do have a knack for seeing the big picture and the ability to see what really can improve a story idea. Overall, the meeting went great. I'm glad I had that kind of experience. The more I work with high-profile execs, the more comfortable I get doing it. But it does show, as writers, we just need to trust ourselves and trust our opinions. I guess like anything, it takes practice. And the more we do it the better we get. Here's to seeing more and more of that in all our futures!

Let it be

How many times as a screenwriter does the "perfect" opportunity pass us up and we just think, how come?! Why me?! Why didn't this wonderful opportunity happen for me!!! Well, I'll tell you. It wasn't your opportunity to be had. I think the sooner we realize that, the better a writer we can become. See, there is a time for when our success will happen. But if we fight that, we are actually almost like the salmon swimming upstream. Only that salmon actually makes it. But for us, we're fighting against our current of success. And it's taking us much longer to get where we want to get. So instead of deciding what success is supposed to be yours, just witness the opportunities that come your way without judgement. And witness the ones that go away, with the same non-judgement. I guarantee you, you will find more success happening sooner when you do that.

Let me give you an example. If anyone has a kid, you'll understand what I'm about to tell you. My son wants these video game toys that we haven't been able to find since before Christmas. I don't care where we look, they don't exist. Online, toy stores, video games stores. Don't exist. So yesterday we found out about a shipment coming in. We were so excited. My son made his list. My husband got there two hours early before the store opened. We were like, yes, we're going to get some! But the store opens and the guy says, "Oh, they actually came a day early and they're all gone." Okay, I know, it's just a toy. But it was what it represented for my son and how many months we've really been looking for these darn things. So at first I'm way bummed. I tell myself, it's just a toy, but I'm still way bummed. But then after a few moments, I really accepted it. I realized, if it's meant to be, we'll find them. If not, there are worst things in the world.

I'm telling you, the moment I did that, something just changed and lifted in the universe. I could almost feel it. So then I start searching online, and I find two of the ones he put on his list! So now I'm like, awesome! I'm feeling better, but still feel the need to find the others. But at this point, I really had let go of the judgement of whether we found these toys or not.

So then we go to the mall just because my son loves walking around there. I tell him, we're not buying anything. He agrees. We go to our usual stores that never have these toys. And at the second store, guess what?! They actually had a whole display of them! That never happens! They literally must have just gotten their shipment in! So we grab two more on his list. I couldn't believe it! Now, before you think I spoil my kid, there's something you need to know, he has to save allowance to pay for these.

But that's besides the point. The point is, I let go of any judgement that went along with it. Would those toys have been there if I had held my judgement? I don't know. That's not what happened though is it. I could just tell that something aligned with me, that the minute I let go of some strong belief and anxiety over this darn toy, that it all worked out for the best.

And that's how we need to think of our screenwriting career as. Yes, we have to work hard, take classes, do the rewrites, join the groups. But...we have to not assign any judgement over when or where our success will happen. If we keep moving forward. Keep learning. Keep working hard. It will happen.

So to inspire you, I'll leave you a few wonderful Beatles lyrics from Let It Be. Every time something in your writing success hasn't happened, really feel and believe these words.

And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree
There will be an answer, let it be
For though they may be parted, there is still a chance that they will see
There will be an answer, let it be
Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be
There will be an answer, let it be